Web Site Report – March 2003

Here’s a selection of the monthly highlights for christian-sauve.com:


1. Mmm. Numbers…

My Prickly "Urchin" web stats engine tells me that…

Report for: christian-sauve.com, March 2003 Total Visitors 5,073  Total Pageviews 10,730  (Corrected total: 6,529) Average Pageviews Per Day 346.12  (Corrected total: 210) Total Hits 16,285  Total Bytes Transferred 311.8MB  Average Visitors Per Day 163.64  Average Hits Per Day 525.32  Average Bytes Transferred Per Day 10.06MB

The "corrected" numbers take out the CSS, robots.txt, PDFs, mis-filed graphic files (ICO, GIF, JPG) and other files mistakenly considered "pages" by the statistics pre-digestion engine. Total results are higher than last month; even average numbers are slightly higher (a surprise given the extra three days in March).

In any case, our top ten most popular pages are

christian-sauve.com/index.html         363 christian-sauve.com/texts/free-movie-tickets.htm  203 christian-sauve.com/reviews.html       186 christian-sauve.com/texts/solaris-explanation.htm 171 christian-sauve.com/reviews/movies-2001.htm       168 christian-sauve.com/reviews/movies-1999.htm       138 christian-sauve.com/new-york/day_2.html           132 christian-sauve.com/reviews/movies-2000.htm       131 christian-sauve.com/reviews/movies-1998.htm       115 christian-sauve.com/links.html         100

…which is roughly consistent with last month’s results. Gee, do you suppose movie reviews are popular…?  D’ya think SOLARIS might have confused a few people? (Boy, I can’t wait until the DVD release)

If you care about such things, (I do!), here’s a look at browser statistics for the month (by visitors):

Explorer|6     2017 Explorer|5      1281  Scooter|3     585 Netscape|5      320 Netscape|4      301

The accursed Netscape 4 squeaks by to place in fifth place, though with a paltry 6% of all visitors (most probably helped by a heavy usage of the site by people at my workplace, still stuck with N.4x)


2. Where do these people come from?

Our top five sources of referrals (in visitors) were

google.com/search     903 yahoo.com/search     316 www.google.ca/search     225 yahoo.com/bin/search     139 msn.com/results.aspx   122

Slight increases in all cases but MSN, whose result was affected by a switch from ASP to ASPx result pages during the month.

There were no new links seen this month.


3. Ohh! Visitor comments!

Busy month for the christian-sauve.com mailbox.  Here’s a sample of what I got:

1. "Brother Chuck" wrote:

whats up brother in christ i am happy to write u this picks of note that gonna gives me joy whenever i remember to write u main,

…followed by a series of messages where he simply cut and pasted sections of my site back to me. Awww.

Alas, the email address he gave was invalid (which happens all too often when people can’t spell), so in the hope "Brother Chuck" is reading this, here’s the answer I wanted to send him:

Your happiness is heart-warming, but not as much as your insistence on copy-and-pasting two more of my own documents to me. Keep your good spirits up, remember to use good punctuation, don’t drink and post and the whole world will smile with you.

2. Constantine Valhouli, director of the documentary SEX, LIES AND SUPERHEROES, wrote to ask in part

I recently came across a mention of one of my upcoming films (Sex, Lies & Superheroes) on your web site, and was impressed by your writing. I wanted to drop a line to see if you might be interested in screening an advance copy of the film for review on your site?

My reactions were (in order)

  1. Hey, free movie!
  2. Hm. I better check the web site of the film. ( www.sexliessuperheroes.com )
  3. Holy crikey! Look at the people they interviewed for the film! I really want to see it!
  4. (reply:) If you can afford to ship to Canada and if it doesn’t matter that this site attracts only a dozen people per month, please send it!

I’ll let you know. But I really do want to see it.

3. Clint B. wrote to say

I totally agree with your review of Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451, and i am using it for a research project in my junior year english class. Thanks

To which I replied

No, thank you. After seeing, through referral logs, dozens of people using my web site for essay-writing assistance, you’re the first one to actually write me to notify me of the fact. You, sir, have class.  Keep it up.

4. The Mysterious yet refined "J" wrote to correct me on an embarrassing detail:

In "All the President’s Men" Woodward is played by Robert Redford – not Paul Newman! That said, I can understand the slip, considering that they mix well together like croutons and caesar salad.

Yikes – one of my favourite book/movie/actor too!  You can rest assured that the mistake was corrected minutes after receiving the email.

Love your reviews – except the one on "The Conversation". If it didn’t hit you the first time – watch it again! (I, for example, consider it the predecessor for films like ‘Enemy of the State’)

"J" probably has a point. Though the links with ENEMY OF THE STATE are obvious (down to the latter movie using a photo of a younger Gene Hackman in the first film to establish background), I saw THE CONVERSATION in trying times, and could probably benefit from another -hopefully more relaxed- stab at the film.

5. Michael, the webmaster of "Necessary Narcissism", wrote, wondering:

I was interested to see your link to our Necessary Narcissism site, and was wondering how you happened upon it?

Alas, my link to "Necessary Narcissism" was entirely coincidental.  Years ago, I had a series of pleasant emails exchanges between myself and a charming young lady who maintained a site also called, yep, "Necessary Nascissism".  When, months ago, the site went offline (along, apparently, with the lady in question), I simply updated the link to the nearest Google equivalent.  Michael has since informed me that all links are purely accidental. Oops. That’ll teach me.

5. A concerned mother writes to ask

My son is supposed to read the book, "The Falling Angel" by William Hjortsberg for his 7th grade school literature group. This is our first year in public school. Pre school to 5th and 7th grade (two children) has been Christian schools. I read the book’s back cover and am not sure this is appropriate for him (or other young adults/teens) to read. The book delves into black magic, voodoo, mistresses, 666, …. and who knows what other "dark," non Christian areas.

Have you read this book? If so, please provide some insight.

Boy, someone took a wrong turn on the "Christian" search queries. I tried to tactfully answer that

  1. I wasn’t the best person to ask given that, among other things, I hadn’t read the book.
  2. You can get reader comments from Amazon, and they definitely suggest that the book is, in fact, aimed at a more adult audience.
  3. I couldn’t pass the opportunity to affirm the Right to Read, whatever the age,
    whatever the subject. (and included a link to "The Student’s Right to Read")

Apparently, I was either very convincing or not tactful enough, because I haven’t heard from this concerned parent since then.


4. Search Queries Oddities

(This being the crowd-favourite section in which we take a look at the search engine queries used by various visitors to find christian-sauve.com)


4.1 – Top ten queries

>solaris explanation (x33) >free movie screenings (x29) >free movie tickets (x18) >solaris explained (x17) >solaris movie explanation (x15) >sauve (x7) >solaris movie explained (x6) >christian sauve (x5) >isbn lookup (x5) >movies before 1970 (x5)

So… people get free ticket to SOLARIS, and are then confused enough to look for explanations from me?


4.2 – My name is (what?)

>christian advice for losing weight >christian book promoter >christian critic of vonnegut >christian films comedy >christian flash movies (x2) >christian jokes >christian losing weight (x2) >christian meme theory >christian movie actors (x2) >christian movie ratings (x2) >christian movie reviewers (x2) >christian movie reviews (x2) >christian movie reviews manchurian candidate >christian opinions about author orson scott card >christian powerpoint flash >christian recommended movies (x2) >christian scientist essay >christian scientology medical >christian statistics >christian web page mistakes >christian movie reviews gattaca

After months of deriding these, you supposed I wouldn’t still be amazed by the curious habit to sticking "christian" in front of just about every word construction. But I still am, somehow. Still, the following managed to get a laugh out of me:

>why christian films suck

Er… Hint: Because they’re christian?


4.3 – Local Issues

>lescale rockland web page >st.laurent shopping mall

Hm. Not much there this month.


4.4 – Let’s all go to the Movies!

The Solaris Whazzat-fest continues:

>explanation movie solaris >explanation of solaris (x2) >explanation solaris >explanation solaris film (x2) >plot solaris film explained >snow solaris killed >soderbergh solaris explanation >solaris an explanation >solaris ending explanation (x2) >solaris explained clooney (x2) >solaris explanation ending rheya (x2) >solaris explanation george clooney (x2) >solaris explanation movie (x2) >solaris explanation soderbergh (x2) >solaris film ending explained (x2) >solaris film explanation (x3) >solaris film interpretation (x2) >solaris interpretation (x3) >solaris movie >solaris movie revision >solaris plot explanation (x3) >solaris the movie explained (x2) >solaris the movieexplanation >steven soderbergh solaris ending explained

Eh. This will explode when the DVD is released.

>the plot to memento makes it sound  like it ought to be a b movie

Well, that’s a new trick. Instead of having someone searching and reading one of my reviews, they search and I end up reading on of theirs. (Albeit a very short one.)


4.5 – Everybody was cyber-stalking!

So, who’s hot and who’s not?

>bad with numbers tia carrere >biodome rene zellweger >catherine zeta jones wedding hairdo >clea duvall clip scene natasha lyonne >clip of roselyn sanchez in rush hour 2 with lingerie  >confidence rachel weisz sex scene >emily mortimer spanking >erika eleniak nude (x2) >free mia kirshner nude >halle berrys exercise and diet >janeanne garofalo american flag >jennifer jason leigh allan cummings >jennifer tilly biodome >lucy liu dominatrix multimedia >monica bellucci images from brotherhood of the wolf >penelope cruzs haircut >rebecca de mornay costume risky business >roselyn sanchez in lingerie from rush hour 2 >roselyn sanchez nude free >roshumba williams pictures >selmablairnaked >shannyn sossamonhairstyle images >teà leoni pictures >thandie newtons nude picture >the haunting deleted catherine zeta jones kiss lesbian >the tuxedojennifer love hewitt nude >tian xin nude

Take your pick.


4.6 – The Perv-a-tron!

>see free movies of cheerleaders having sex in  public places.

As opposed to "see expensive movies of goth girls being bored in very private places". Maybe. Oh okay, I give up; they’re no way I can bake fun of that.


4.7 – Strange, disturbing and wondrous…

>action cinema film slut

Oh yes, that’s me. I’ll do anything for a really good action movie.

>historical romances sarcastic book reviews

Ooh.  Like my site is going to help.


Until next time, my name is Christian Sauvé and I remain… obsessed by web statistics.

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