Moviegoing 2004
(under construction, but pretty much final)
2005, Christian Sauvé
This being a flash-retrospective of the movies of 2004, written and updated until the Oscars are given out in February 2005:
- THE BEST: Every end-of-year retrospective must have a top-ten list...
- HONORABLE MENTIONS: Other films worth a look.
- BOTTOM OF THE BARREL: Movies to avoid.
- A QUICK GUIDE TO OTTAWA-AREA THEATRES: For once, some regional content.
- WHAT ABOUT THE OSCARS? My picks for the year.
1. THE BEST
My Ten Favourite Films of 2004
(This is not a "best movies of the year" list. This is a "my favourite films of the year" list.)
1. THE INCREDIBLES
- Plot: The superheroic family that saves the world together, stays together.
- Why I think it's great: If you've seen the film, you already know all about its greatness.
- I hear your objections, but: Hang a second: Does anyone have any objections to this being one of the top ten films of the year?
2. FAHRENHEIT 9/11
- Plot: George W. Bush sucks! And he's dumb! And evil!
- Why I think it's great: Why don't you read the plot again? Nah; seriously, whether you think it's a documentary or propaganda, you have to admit that it's (by far) one of the most emotionally charged film of the year.
- I hear your objections, but: "My pets go 'meow' while yours go 'moo' / Your state is red; my state is blue." (Adam Wasson, via Pandagon)
3. SHAUN OF THE DEAD
- Plot: How to survive a zombie invasion, British working-class style.
- Why I think it's great: Blending romance, comedy, horror and thrills without missing a single beat, this film is fun from start to finish. Strong writing, good acting, efficient directing and snappy editing. "Cheers!"
- I hear your objections, but: The two single-take trips to the convenience store alone are worth the price of the movie.
4. CONTROL ROOM
- Plot: The American invasion of Iraq, as seen by the Arab media.
- Why I think it's great: Speaking only with archival footage and occasional title cards, this film shows a war from the perspective of the rest of the world, and, by contrast, effortlessly transforms flag-waving American media reports into their own worst critics.
- I hear your objections, but: This film may not tell the whole truth, but it tells more of it than American audiences got for the past few years.
5. MEAN GIRLS
- Plot: A girl discovers curious similarities between her new High School and the African wilderness she comes from.
- Why I think it's great: This is the way teen movies should be: Written by adults, fast and zesty, with fabulous actors, tons of great lines and oodles of fun.
- I hear your objections, but: Any movie in which the protagonist struggles to rediscover her inner nerdness gets my vote.
6. KILL BILL VOLUME 2
- Plot: Quentin Tarantino does what he wants, and laughs all the way to the bank twice for the same amount of effort.
- Why I think it's great: Because I'm a film geek and Tarantino is a film geek. After so many ordinary films made with mere competence, it's refreshing to see what a gifted auteur can do. Pure fun!
- I hear your objections, but: Tarantino is back.
- (the above reprinted verbatim from last year)
7. SUPER SIZE ME
- Plot: A man decides to wage war on his body through McDonalds products.
- Why I think it's great: Filmmaker Morgan Spurlock makes for a likable protagonist, but the film is first and foremost a telling indictment of the way Americans eat... and that can't be bad.
- I hear your objections, but: There is an admirable madness in eating nothing but McDonalds for thirty consecutive days.
8. HOTEL RWANDA
- Plot: During the 1994 genocide in Rwanda, a hotel manager saves truckloads of innocent people.
- Why I think it's great: I don't willingly step into theaters for genocide dramas that make you hate the human race, but this one cleverly uses the tools of suspense movies and tones down the histrionics. The result is gripping and effective.
- I hear your objections, but: Oh, all right, I'll admit it; this is my "I'm being a socially sophisticated moviegoer" entry on this list.
9. A VERY LONG ENGAGEMENT
- Plot: In 1920, a woman tries to find out what happened to her fiancé during the Great War.
- Why I think it's great: It's Jean-Pierre Jeunet; need I say more? All of the tangential storytelling, the oddball visual flair, the comfortable French atmosphere of AMELIE is there, along with some dynamite WW1 action sequences.
- I hear your objections, but: I'm sorry, I'm just a sucker for Jeunet's visual style.
10. I, ROBOT
- Plot: Killer robots! Will Smith! Squee!!
- Why I think it's great: Well, "great" isn't the word I'd use, but as far as straight-up silly SF action movies are concerned, this is the one to watch this year after you're done with THE INCREDIBLES. Cool directing, a few interesting set-pieces, wry riffs on Asimov's stories and some nice design work.
- I hear your objections, but: Oh, if you want to laugh, go ahead. I won't mind. I put this here instead of SIDEWAYS for a reason, after all.
Deeply respectful honourable mentions go to the documentary THE CORPORATION (2003) as well as the martial arts films SHAOLIN SOCCER and HERO (both 2002), all of whom were seen this year, but (under Academy rules) qualify for previous years. Had I seen them earlier, they probably would have made the Top-10 ranking for their respective years.
2. HONOURABLE MENTIONS
When all is said and done, one can't live on merely ten films a year. And you really shouldn't trust a critic's top ten list anyway; should it be erased and replaced by another list made a week later, it could be completely different. So, keeping the above in mind, here are my recommendations for the other good movies of the year.
If you like Science-Fiction, try the following quadruple feature: Start with SKY CAPTAIN AND THE WORLD OF TOMORROW, follow it up by THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW, rave about the special effects, bitch about the stupid scripts and then watch PRIMER, then bitch about the special effects and rave about the (too-convoluted) script. Then, once you're confused enough, conclude with ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND and go "Wow, this movie had both of them right!"
If comic-book superheroes are your thing, there are few better choices than SPIDER-MAN 2 and HELLBOY, despite some repetitive material.
For the kids, HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN and SHREK 2 are worthy follow-up to their prequels, and you know they're going to ask for them anyway. Then you may want to surprise them with ELLA ENCHANTED and stay to watch this surprisingly entertaining fairy tale.
But wait; you and the kids ought to have a look at two more movies: LEMONY SNICKET'S A SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS is quite good (with a slightly darker tone) and so is THE POLAR EXPRESS (in a rather more energetic fashion.)
All right; enough with the kids' stuff. I'm biased enough to recommend the Canadian romance/horror film WHITE SKIN [LA PEAU BLANCHE], the creepy BUTTERFLY EFFECT as well as the ultra-dark thriller SAW. Oh, all right, THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST is kind of fun to watch in a shlocko horror-film way.
In a lighter, but still suspenseful vein, I had a lot of fun with CELLULAR, COLLATERAL and NATIONAL TREASURE, and I'm nearly certain that you will too.
If all you want is epic moviemaking, TROY is all you need.
On the other hand, if you want a movie that will make you feel as if everything is all right with the world, there's no better choice than BRIDE AND PREJUDICE.
If you've been crying yourself to sleep ever since the 2004 American Presidential Elections, go ahead and make your despair even worse by watching GOING UPRIVER, the unashamedly worshipping biography of John Kerry.
Finally, if all of the above seems a little bit too jejeune for your Oscar-worthy tastes, I can recommend MILLION-DOLLAR BABY, THE AVIATOR and SIDEWAYS as critically-acclaimed films that actually live up to the hype for common folks.
3. BOTTOM OF THE BARREL
Try to avoid those, if you can: (in increasingly frustrating order)
5. SPANGLISH
- Plot: Rich white people pay illegal immigrant to be their maid, and then they're surprised when she's not a friend to them! Funny stuff!
- Why I think it's bad: It took roughly five minutes for the movie to disgust me and nothing it did afterward changed my mind. Scattered plot, caricatural characters, creepy acceptance of economic exploitation, awful ending; it's all there.
- No, but really: Your kid is fat, but not hurting her feelings is a lot more important than teaching her how to eat well so that she doesn't die prematurely from obesity.
4. STARSKY & HUTCH
- Plot: Let's remake a seventies TV show! Genius!
- Why I think it's bad: Well, not as bad as completely useless. Redundant. Forgettable. Devoid of any value whatsoever. A waste of talents. Another cookie-cutter laugh-free comedy feeding the gaping maw of the modern cinematic industry.
- No, but really: I'm struggling to remember anything amusing from this film, and the only thing that comes to mind is "Do it. Do it. DO IT."
3. SLEEPOVER
- Plot: A girl sacrifices everything to the altar of social conformity... and succeeds.
- Why I think it's bad: Beyond the fact that the film is just boring to watch, this film basically glorifies fitting in, getting a cute boyfriend and being popular as the only ideals worth striving for, justifying whatever means required. There is also a surprising amount of frankly sexual material... and it's all aimed at tweenage girls.
- No, but really: Did you say creepy?
2. TAXI
- Plot: Jimmy Fallon is threatened with death and, sadly, escapes all harm.
- Why I think it's bad: From the contemptuous way the film opens with a svelte body double that is supposed to be Queen Latifah, everything in this film screams "paying audiences, you suck." Unfunny, embarrassing, interminable and dumb.
- No, but really: Even Jennifer Esposito and the dynamic car chase cinematography can't save this film.
1. PAPARAZZI
- Plot: A feel-good revenge fantasy for all fifty people on planet Earth who are pissed at Paparazzis.
- Why I think it's bad: From a script filled with contrivances to a protagonist who's worse than even his caricatural antagonists, this film not only glorifies therapy-by-murder and vigilante justice but does so in a spectacularly inept fashion.
- No, but really: This has got to be a vanity project for celebrities. Shame that the rest of us can't care a bit about their particular problems.
A dishonorable mention goes to the incessant series of pre-movie advertisements crammed down our throats during entire months. Those are more than enough to make me pick one theater over another.
4. A QUICK UPDATE ON OTTAWA-AREA THEATRES
Prices went up, service went down... it was business-as-usual for the Ottawa-area theaters this year. (In fact, most of the following notes are taken verbatim from last year.) I can only comment on where I went, so, in decreasing order of frequentation, here are my comments on:
- Silvercity (Famous Players): My theater of choice this year, not because it's cheap (it's not) or respectful of movies (they're ravished on the altar of commercialism on a hourly basis) but the selection is great, the location is convenient and the seating is unsurpassed in the Ottawa area.
- The Mayfair (Independant): My attendance to the Mayfair was a hit-and-miss affair this year, thanks to their continued scheduling loopiness. The price is still right, but their tendency to replay the same movies for weeks on end is even worse than their habit to show double-features that are completely unrelated to one another.
- Rideau Centre (Famous Players): Cheap but rather good mall theater, made even better by the addition of comfy seats this year. The price is good and you get what you're paying for. It's a shame that their matinees aren't more consistent.
- The World Exchange (Cineplex Odeon): Prices stayed stuck at a ludicrously high C$10, which is exactly the price of the suburban cinemas except for the small screens and bad seating. Suburbia, here I come!
- Orleans (Cineplex Odeon): Prices are fine, audio-visual experience is fine and so is the rest of the experience. Sometimes in a handy location, sometimes not, depending on my schedule. I would like to support them more often.
- Cinéma 9 (Cineplex Odeon): Decent theater, with the sole attraction of being the most accessible French-language cineplex in the Ottawa area. I can live with the rather high price, but it takes a good reason to go there.
Here's a tip on how to fight high ticket prices by supporting cheap-but-inconvenient theaters while sticking it to the expensive-but-convenient ones: Go to the cheap theaters, buy a hundred dollar's worth of gift certificates and then spend them at the expensive theater when you have no other choice. (Just make sure that you're buying gift certificates for the same chain of theaters!)
Rumors have it that St-Laurent Cinema is about to open again under the Rainbow discount banner. As you can expect, I'm looking forward to this with considerable glee. Another competing chain! $4.25 tickets! A convenient location! [February 2005 update: Yes, the Rainbow Cinema Saint-Laurent Centre is open for business and it is good. Quite good. If it keeps up, expect to find me there every two or three weeks.]
5. WHAT ABOUT THE OSCARS?
As of early 2005, here how I'd give out the Oscars, damn the Academy!
- Costume Design: THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA
- Film Editing: THE AVIATOR
- Makeup: LEMONY SNICKET'S A SERIES...
- Original Song: "Hot Chocolate", THE POLAR EXPRESS (What can I say? It's the only one I can remember)
- Original Score: THE INCREDIBLES
- Sound Mixing: THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE
- Sound Editing: THE POLAR EXPRESS
- Visual Effects: I, ROBOT
- Art Direction (Set Design): PHANTOM OF THE OPERA
- Cinematography: TROY
- Adapted Screenplay: MEAN GIRLS
- Original Screenplay: THE INCREDIBLES
- Supporting Actor: Jamie Foxx, COLLATERAL
- Supporting Actress: Cate Blanchett, THE AVIATOR
- Actor: Jim Carrey, ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND
- Actress: Uma Thurman, KILL BILL Vol. 2
- Foreign-Language Film: LA PEAU BLANCHE (Canada) (But I'm biased, having worked in a very tangential role on the film's teaser web site)
- Documentary: CONTROL ROOM
- Animated Feature: THE INCREDIBLES
- Directing: Quentin Tarantino, KILL BILL Vol. 2
- Picture: FAHRENHEIT 9/11
(As usual, I have no clue... about the three Documentary, Animated or Live Action short films.)