Tooth Fairy (2010)

(On TV, May 2019) Nearly every modern action star has one in their filmography—a kid’s movie, meant to humanize their four-quadrant image, give them something to watch with their own kids, and provide them with an alternate side-line if ever they get too old for the action stuff. Their quality is … variable. Tooth Fairy is Dwayne Johnson’s kid’s movie, and it’s not one of the better examples of the form. It’s about nothing less than a disillusioned hockey enforcer (so renowned for dental harm that he’s nicknamed the Tooth Fairy) discovering that there is such a thing as tooth fairies … and that he’s been summoned in their ranks. Never mind the trite believe-in-your-dreams stuff—that’s on par for the form. What’s more annoying is the film’s choppy rhythm, occasionally dubious morality, multiplying subplots, syrupy execution and weird chronology. The hockey details are also often ludicrously wrong, but that’s to be expected from a Hollywood movie. Few things manage to distinguish Tooth Fairy from the morass of similar films, but there are a few: some of the worldbuilding details of the fantasy tooth fairies are fun, and the repartee between Johnson and Stephen Merchant has its moments. One thing that doesn’t count as much is Johnson’s charm, and that’s due to the same reason why I suspect he wouldn’t make the same movie today—his character here is portrayed as far more abrasive than his current screen persona: even as part of the film’s “here’s how he acted before knowing better” act, making the hero an arrogant dream-sapping hockey enforcer celebrated for the physical damage he inflicts on others is a curious choice, not to mention the sequence in the middle of the movie where he cheats his way to personal satisfaction. I don’t quite think that today’s mister-positivity Johnson would go back to that kind of character. And maybe that’s for the best. In the meantime, there’s Tooth Fairy to remind you of early-Rock movies.