Six Minutes to Midnight (2020)
(On Cable TV, September 2021) I don’t often finish films in perplexity about the existence of said film, but Six Minutes to Midnight had me stumped. It’s a bizarre mixture of a low-key story, miscast lead and overbearing execution, and just isn’t as interesting as it thinks it is. If I have the film’s production history correct, it started as a vanity project for writer-actor Eddie Izzard (who wrote the script based on childhood hometown stories) and that explains a lot. Taking as a springboard the existence of an English finishing school for daughters of the Nazi elite in the weeks before the start of WW2, the film soon delves into spy-movie shenanigans, as Izzard plays a counter-espionage agent sent undercover as a teacher to find out more about another evil teacher and the Nazis’ dastardly plan to go back to Germany with somehow-acquired super-secret plans. It feels like a very lackadaisical justification for a spy thriller, and unfortunately, I never bought into it. That, in turn, made the overdone nature of suspenseful scenes more funny than impressive — by the time we’re in a night-time dogfight between planes to prevent the extraction of their Nazi students and their super-evil teacher, the only thing I kept thinking was “why can’t they just let the Nazis go back home? They’ll lose the war anyway.” Izzard seems wasted in a serious but not overly impressive role — sure, it shows range from his comic persona, but it’s as if they left two thirds of his personality on the shelf. Flat direction from Andy Goddard doesn’t help either, and there’s a limit to what even Judy Dench can do to rescue the result. At best unremarkable and at worst misguided, Six Minutes to Midnight seems destined to end up in the heap of WW2 film arcana: a disappointing curiosity unable to make the most of what it has at its disposal.