Luna Lauren Velez

(On Cable TV, March 2022) Oof—the low-budget stench is overpowering in Rogue Hostage, especially when the film tries to build a tense action thriller out of a wholly unconvincing department store setting. The concept is not too bad—war veterans take revenge upon a billionaire at one of his stores, against another war veteran trying to save himself, his son and other civilians—but the execution is what kills the film, and it does it very early. A painful opening clearly established the bland ramshackle cinematography, by-the-number dialogues, convoluted narrative contrivances and amateurish direction from Jon Keeyes. Rogue Hostage eventually manages a very mild narrative velocity, but never overcomes the initial rebuff of a low-budget, low-skill production exhibiting itself naked. Those kinds of films give a better appreciation of what the bottom of the cinematic barrel looks like, well under the so-called bombs laughed about at the Razzies: it’s impossible to get into the story, because every frame reminds you that you’re watching a film (ineptly) put together by people who don’t know what they’re doing. Perhaps the most amazing thing about Rogue Hostage is the top-line cast: How did John Malkovich, Michael Jai White and Tyrese Gibson get marshalled into this? The only people who do well here are, ironically, in the supporting roles—Luna Lauren Velez is quite nice as the store manager, for instance. But everything else—yikes: bland villain, character relationship complications with no bearing on the plot, ham-fisted political commentary and inert “action” sequences just make this worse and worse. I’ll say one thing, though: Rogue Hostage is bad and inept, but it’s not exactly hateable or excruciating—and that saves it from the very worst. But still—unless you’re feeling in a mood to be punished or bored, there’s no reason at all to see Rogue Hostage—it’s a fourth-generation copy of much better movies at best, and simply useless at worst.