Saturn 3 (1980)

(TubiTV Streaming, December 2021) I barely recall Saturn 3 from my childhood, but considering the racy violent content, it’s probably less for remembering the story than because it was a science-fiction film at a time when I was really interested in those. Ironically, the film’s plot is the kind of thing better suited to undemanding young audiences than anyone with the slightest appetite for complexity or subtlety. The most amazing thing about it for a middle-aged cinephile is probably the cast and (some) of the crew — featuring no less than Kirk Douglas and Farah Fawcett as a “don’t ask questions about their 31-year age difference” couple of scientists whose existence is disrupted by a dangerous man (Harvey Keitel!) and his homicidal robot. Saturn 3 is also directed by musical legend Stanley Donen, from a script by acclaimed novelist Martin Amis and Academy-Awards-winning Star Wars production designer John Barry. That’s one spectacular pedigree, but the difficult making of the film was reportedly an adventure that barely explains the mess on-screen. The story feels remarkably cheap and redundant, once reduced to the most basic gibberish of a killer robot attacking a young woman. The production design is terrible, with robots not even passing the indulgent muster of early-1980s special effects. Some of the early world-building is intriguing, but the script feels like a race to the known value of a killer-robot conclusion. Douglas, Keitel and Fawcett look embarrassed (something confirmed by Keitel’s later comments about the film) and by the time the film ends, the audiences won’t feel any prouder. So much talent for so little result — Saturn 3 is the kind of naïve Science Fiction film that makes the good one look so much better in comparison.