Neon Maniacs (1986)

(On Cable TV, July 2021) I often say that when it comes to horror film, I have a marked preference for supernatural monsters rather than knife-wielding slasher psychos, but director Joseph Mangine’s Neon Maniacs seems determined to ask — what about monsters that act like slasher psychos? Well, my answer won’t surprise anyone — down with psycho slashers no matter if they’re supernatural or not. In this case, our twelve maniacs are mutated monster from under the Golden Gate bridge who take it upon themselves to terrorize a high-school student who can’t get anyone to take her seriously when she reports the menace. Plenty of gore effects follow their rampage through San Francisco. If you’ve seen enough 1980s teenage horror movies, there won’t be anything new or fresh her to keep you interested — it’s the same formula, and it’s about as effective. (Which is to say: not very.)  Despite a title that promises bright colours, the dark muddy cinematography is also in-line with the norm at the time, which doesn’t make the result any more pleasant to watch unless you’re going for that VHS aesthetic. I can’t imagine very many scenarios in which a viewing of Neon Maniacs is recommended or even preferable to anything else. But then again that’s my default position on just about every slasher horror movie ever made.