The Cars that Ate Paris (1974)
(On Cable TV, January 2020) You would think that a movie about a remote village making its living off causing car crashes for unwary tourists and then stripping their cars for part and lobotomizing any survivors would be more interesting than what ultimately comes out of The Cars that Ate Paris. If you’re watching for the iconic ultra-spiky VW Bug on the poster, then be warned that it shows up late and doesn’t stay long: The film is closer to an enigmatic arthouse drama blended with a gory exploitation film and if you don’t know what that means (I don’t!), then the movie itself will not necessarily enlighten you. Writer-director Peter Weir made equally frustrating movies later on, but The Cars that Ate Paris is noteworthy in that it vastly underperforms against expectations. The film is ugly, laborious, unfocused and unclear about what it’s trying to do. The third act, which finally opposes the town’s two factions, is a narrative mess of jumbled objectives and hazy characterization. It’s also disconnected from the film’s first act, which seemed to be about something else entirely. Even the film’s title is a misdirection. In other words, I really did not enjoy much about The Cars That Ate Paris—even as a low-budget Ozploitation film, the best we can say about it is that it seems to be a prototype for the Mad Max series. On its own, it’s a dud.